Okay so um FAIR WARNING MY BEASTS: This book had me crying within the first chapter. And the second. BASICALLY I WAS CRYING AND BITING MY NAILS AND LAUGHING THE WHOLE WAY THROUGH. Okay I don’t bite my nails BUT I WAS VERY NERVOUS.
Also. Let’s not talk about the fact that I took an unannounced and very long hiatus or that I am going to be posting reviews NOT in the order that I read them. I am a rebel. I AM BACK.
- Osaron. Otherwise known as super evil being made of pure magic with a thirst for MORE. Also a slight hankering for possessing people and destroying things. MY KIND OF VILLAIN I TELL YOU. He is utterly despicable with no black and white. No grey areas. ONLY BLACK AND HE LIKES IT.
- MY SHIPS FINALLY SAIL. THIS IS HUGE NEWS GUYS THERE IS MUCH SAILING OF SHIPS FINALLY SOMEONE BLESS V. E. SCHWAB.
- Lila’s little (GARGANTUAN??) slightly obvious secret is revealed and it is SO FREAKING AHMAHSING
- SO MUCH FRIGGING MAGIC. All the magic your soul could ever want I promise. (I may or may not be crying slightly)
- HOLLAND. He was so easy to love/hate in the first two. BUT THERE WILL BE NONE OF THAT IN THIS BECAUSE HE IS NOW ACTUALLY RIVALING MY LOVE FOR KELL????????? He is a squishy cinnamon roll and his story is entirely unfair and I just love him so much. SCHWAB IS SO CRUEL TO HIM I LOVE IT.
- To die or not to die? That is the main question in this book. FEAR NOT. YOU WILL BE ON YOUR TOES THE WHOLE TIME. Also you will be entirely a mess afterward as well. A MESS I TELL YOU.
- Pirates. NEED I SAY MORE? Also one of my favorite quotes from this book (and trust me, there are many AND THAT’S SAYING SOMETHING BECAUSE I’M NOT A QUOT-Y KIND OF QUEEN): “Dead men can’t hold grudges.” And how true that is. HOW VERY TRUE.
- Also: Secret floating pirate marketplace with all manner of magical artifacts and a curious captain. BE STILL MY HEART.
- Rhy. RHY. RHYYYYYY. Rhy is so brave. And smart. And amazing. And enduring. And he suffers. There is so much suffering. Sweet suffering.
- Alucard. DID I MENTION SUFFERING YET?????????????
- Also Rhy and Alucard. PICTURE HEARTS HERE. MY BLACK HEART IS GLOWING WITH HAPPINESS.
- Also probably Holland.
- And my dearest Lila Bard and her pirate-y-ness. Bless her. Bless her so much. Her dreams are amazing and I too aspire to one day be a pirate. Because pirates are cool.
- It may have slipped your attention that I have not said much about Kell?? It may or may not be because I cry just thinking of the suffering that he, too goes through. They all had it bad, don’t get me wrong. But KELL. There were points where I was laughing. He is so wonderful. Points were I cried. Points where I screamed at him for decisions and then….then there is just one thing that broke my heart. My heart is still breaking, I kid you not. Kell. The sweet, sure and also very badass Antari suffers. SUFFERS I TELL YOU.
Dear god I hope that this has convinced you to start this amazing series IMMEDIATELY. And if you have read this and are fevering with me and also crying because it’s over. FEAR NOT. Schwab has been subtly (or not so subtly) hinting that there are more stories to be written about this glorious world. THERE ARE HEARTS IN MY EYES. HEARTSSSSSSS. I’m secretly hoping for White London books????? PLEASE OH PRETTY PLEASE. I love my Red London but White and Black are so Mysterious and Very Cool.
HAVE YOU READ THESE BOOKS??? If not what is holding you back?? (perhaps I can use my powerful powers (yes I know that was redundant leave me alone!) of persuasion to persuade you otherwise!) Are you as dead as me after this series ending? ARE YOU AN UTTER TRAINWRECK???