I know that it isn’t mother’s day, but why do we need just one day to honor our mothers on? I remember being a little tyrant of a kid. I was MEAN. I was mean to my friends, I was mean to my sisters, I was mean to my mom. Now I know that my meanness was me acting out from the abuse my entire family suffered at the hands of my father. But thinking back on it I feel so guilty, because I did not see what my mom had done for me. If I was mad, didn’t get what I wanted or was expecting, I told her I hated her. It wasn’t until I had passed age 14 that I got over myself started to have an amazing relationship with my mom again, and I realized that she is the bravest woman that I probably will ever know. She is my rock.
When she found out that she wasn’t the only one that my father was abusing, she wasted absolutely no time in getting herself and us away from him. We moved away, packing anything we could fit in the trailer in one day, with absolutely no money. I shared a bedroom with all four of my sisters in a tiny house that we now refer to as ‘the box house’. That should give you an idea of how small it was. My mom had dropped out of university after she married my dad, but as soon as she was on her own, she went to school full time as a single mother with five daughters so that she could provide for us. Still, when we needed her she was there for us. For every doctor’s appointment, or dentist appointment and band and orchestra concert. She was there.
I have so many people that I owe so many things to, but most of all my mother, who never once told me that becoming an author would be impossible. The world told me that. My mother never taught me that earning the big bucks is more important than being happy. The world taught me that. My mother taught me the importance and value of hard work and perseverance. There were times (and still are!) when I looked at her and thought, ‘If that were me, I would have given up a long time ago.’ She does amazing things time and time again. As a kid, people would tell me ‘You’re mom is amazing, do you know that?’ or ‘You have the strongest mother in the world.’ and I thought, ‘What are you talking about? She’s just my mom!’ But as I got older I realized that regular people can’t do what she does. Not only did she go to school full time as a single mother with five daughters so that she could provide for us, she sews, knits, does her own remodeling (FULL ON remodeling), cooks, works 50 hour weeks and more, sings, plays the flute… and that’s just the beginning.
Now, even though I live half a world away, she is still there for me when I need her. When I told her that I was leaving our religion and moving in with my boyfriend, she still loved me and treated me the same. When I cried myself to sleep because I didn’t want to see my boss the next day, she listened. When I got homesick, she listened. When my sister in law died, she found a way to pay for half of my flight back home because she knew I needed her to hold me, that I needed to cry and stop being strong for a moment. When I told her that I had finally realized what my dream was, she supported me.
Take a moment today to appreciate the things your mom has done for you that maybe you took for granted, or maybe you didn’t see.
Thank you, Mom. I love you.